July 8, 2013 05:49
Semi-professional curmudgeon and full-time angry old man Ray Green got his camo boxers in a wad when he saw a photograph of a gay pride flag wafting in the breeze at Girard Park.
Two thumbs up for Amurika!

Semi-professional curmudgeon and full-time angry old man Ray Green got his camo boxers in a wad when he saw a photograph in The Daily Advertiser of a gay pride flag wafting in the breeze at Girard Park during a National [Gay] Pride Month celebration last month - a commemoration rendered more poignant by the U.S. Supreme Court days before striking down the bigoted Defense of Marriage Act.

The moribund Green, a frequent gadfly at City-Parish Council meetings, enlisted the aid of District 6 Councilman Andy Naquin, a steady-as-she-goes bearded man who billows whichever way the hot, moist air from the teapot blows him.

According to The Advertiser, Naquin plans to draft an ordinance that would prohibit any but government flags - and maybe a Mardi Gras flag because nothing bespeaks dignity and bald eagles like Coors Lite and Cheap Plastic Crap - from flying atop poles on property owned by Lafayette Consolidated Government. (Isn't Mardi Gras, literally, a religious observance? Don't go there, Andy!)

A Korean War vet and self-proclaimed "Christian-American defender," Green told the daily, "I did not go overseas and fight for our country so that we could come back and be subject to something like that. Several of us (veterans) feel that the flying of this flag is a poke in the eye of a way of life." Green goes on to qualify his worldview by telling The Advertiser he "isn't against the gays," he just more or less finds same-sex sexiness kind of icky.

According to his Facebook page,
Ray Green actually likes flags.

We can just hear a World War I veteran, upon passage of the 19th Amendment in 1920, telling a reporter in a crackly old newsreel recording, "I did not go overseas and fight for our country so that we could come back and be subject to something like that." Women voting? Sheesh!

Faulty analogy? By the time the United States joined the war in 1917, 16 states had granted women the right to vote, but it wasn't until after the war that the Constitution was amended to fully enfranchise women. Thirteen states, as of this writing, sanction fabulous weddings. The rest will eventually follow.

Just thinking out loud here, Ray, but maybe the reason you went overseas to fight for OUR country was exactly and precisely "something like that." You know, equality for all?

Read the flipping paper